Heyaa
Did I ever tell you how I influenced my dreams? The ones we see when we are sleeping.
Did I tell you I reshaped those unconscious thoughts onceā¦ From a series of disheartening dreams back to my usual heartwarming ones.
I guess not.
Okay, the story goes back to March 2020, when I fell and dislocated my left knee. Except for a few wounds, things were fine. Nothing was broken.
My leg was put in a cast, and I had pleasant bed rest for the next 3 months.
Sometimes around June-July, doc removed the cast and put on a knee brace to support walking. I could walk with the help of a walker.
I practised for a month, two months, three monthsā¦ unsure when to remove the brace and go normal walking. I still didn't regain my balance, so also had doubts if everything was well inside. Beneath the skin.
After about 9 months, in Nov-Dec, I was told that nothing was right. That current situation was to be my future. I have to walk with my knee brace on, with the support of a walker and someone by my side (in case I lose balance).
And that was the beginning of my terrifying dreams.
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OK, back to my storyā¦
Actually, when the doc told me that I wouldnāt be walking normally, I gave up on my wish to travel the world.
Even watching everyone around walkingā¦ took me into a spiral of constant self-pity.
And those pitiful thoughts seeped into my dreams too. I wasnāt having nightmares, actually. But in each dream, that I donāt remember now, I was in a sorry state. In most of my dreams, I sat in a gloomy mood or walked with the brace onā¦ sulky and pale.
I was my jolly self throughout the day, yet my dreams were grey. It kept me worried.
It was in Feb 2021, after three months, that I realised what changed when the doc gave me that news. The only change I could recall was that I consciously avoided any cultural content.
The only change was that I stopped watching anything that triggered my wish to travel. Videos of adventure activities, travel, food, etc.
I thought of undoing it. So, I watched a random travel video on YouTube. And then another one, and one more. Slowly, YouTube started recommending more such videos. The ones I usually watched.
You know what happened after that?
In a week or two, I noticed my dreams returning to their normal style. I wasnāt getting depressing ones anymore. And itās the same still today.
(In my dreams) Iām back travelling, going on an adventure, being part of some fantasyā¦ Even if Iām being wheeled around, Iām my joyous self.
It was a flash of ecstasy at that moment. My stoic self was back in the game.
Made me realize you should focus on what you can do, focus on what you can controlā¦ and let everything else take care of themselves.
āIn all circumstances, we really have just one thing to do: focus on what is in our control as opposed to what is not.ā
Made me realize that once you disregard your limitations, keep them out of focusā¦ you're free. Itās all in your head (sometimes).
Your thoughts affect your life. Your life affects your thoughts. Change one thing, and the other follows. Even if you feel free just in your thoughts, it transforms your reality.
And that was all for today.
Bidding adieu.
Live long and prosper.
See you next week, with another story.